secret to love?

I think I discovered the secret to love today. Disregarding the part on chemistry, attraction and whatnot (they ARE in important), but the origin of relationships all come down to timing. We are always different in every point in time and we want different things because of other experiences. Like take for example, “Jim” if his last girlfriend treated him like crap and they break up. And he meets this girl that is just SO NICE, they have nothing in common at all but she just fawns over him. He obviously will end up with the girl sooner or later after enduring a pretty bad relationship. If he met the girl at ANY other point in life, he probably won’t date her but she entered just at the right moment. I find it fascinating, I mean it also asks the age old question like would we still be friends if I met you now? You know that question? Well….I’m veering off course again… BUT! I just find it so interesting, I don’t know why. I just had to talk about it and not just to my mum. hahaha

But then I don’t believe in soul mates and stuff like that. I think yes, timing is very important in the origin of relationships but it doesn’t define the relationship. I don’t believe that there is only THAT girl/guy for you. It seems so close minded to think that way. Relationships are alive, they grow and they change. It really depends on the couple to work at it. No relationships are easy, they will be fights and troubled times but it depends on the determination of the couple to work at it.

Also! (as I veer off my original thought path), damn. I forgot. hahahaha oh no…. It was a good point too. OH YEAH! Okay, as my dad studied interpersonal communications and he studies conflict for a living. This has impacted me profoundly as I come to discover that conflict is never wrong or right. It merely is. I mean, conflict is not a negative or positive experience on its own, you have to make it yourself. It’s how you recover and how you deal with the conflict that defines it. Also one conflict is not the end of it all, there will be more to grow and learn together about conflict styles and your inner most thoughts.

That’s what it means to be in a relationship to get to know someone and to understand them.

Obviously I veered off course again… hahaha but thats all.

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